Baby sleep schedule is making my evenings miserable

November 20th, 2013 at 01:09 pm

Ok baby Charlotte is over 3 weeks old and my days have just gotten more consumed by her as she gets older. As she is growing, she is sleeping less, eating more and crying A LOT more. Constantly wants to be held. Makes it so hard to get anything else done.

We are experimenting with various sleep methods to get through the night. Given that she sleeps periodically and pretty contentedly in the day (she just falls asleep every few hrs wherever she is)- I have NO IDEA why her 8 pm feeding (last feeding before I go to bed) turns into a cry fest where she feeds herself to sleep but wakes within minutes of being put in her bed and cries until she is picked back up. This cycle continues for up to 2 HOURS with me drifting off for 10 mins and then she wakes- realizes she is in her bed and screams bloody murder.

After that first nightmare shift when we FINALLY get her to sleep- the next 2 feedings are usually quiet with her feeding and falling back asleep within an hour.

Around 6 am she is UP. Wide awake, in a good mood. I wish she would do one more sleep shift and be wide awake, in a good mood around 8 am, but oh well.

Does anyone know WHY my baby refuses to be put to bed after her 8pm feeding? I just keep picking her back up, feeding her more, wait for her to fall asleep and put her down- just to have her stir and start wailing.

Ugh - I would be fine with the current sleep arrangement if she would give me those two hrs between 8 -10pm to sleep and not scream.

Posted in Education | 14 Comments »

14 Responses to “Baby sleep schedule is making my evenings miserable”

creditcardfree Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 01:19 pm 1384953597
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I wish I knew...both my girls had a brief stint of that type of sleep thing around the same age. You might call your pediatrician. Also maybe she's too full? Some babies get acid reflux, but I think that would be more often during the day. A pacifier might allow her to suck without getting full. These are just thoughts and ideas...no idea if they are right for your little one! Stay strong this is temporary.
TashaC. Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 01:31 pm 1384954311
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She wont take a pacifier! I don't know why. She does not suck on anything- except for feeding. Occasionally she will work herself into a crying state she will suck her knuckles and calm down. But that's not even every day. But no fingers or thumb and she spits out the pacifier while screaming.

I don't think she has reflux because she's fine for the other 10 feedings a day she does.

If I wait long enough- this will pass.
momcents Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 01:40 pm 1384954849
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Oh boy, been there and done that many times over. Are you particularly stressed and different at that bedtime feeding (anxious)? Maybe Charlotte is sensing that. I'd try making it as effortless and relaxing for you as possible. Dim lights, quiet music, candles? Might help to reduce some of the chaos?

Take care. We've all been there! I second ccf's suggestion of putting a call into the pediatrician. Just talking to a nurse always put things in perspective and they can offer something you might not have thought of.
creditcardfree Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 01:41 pm 1384954877
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The sucking on a pacifier is different than the sucking they do for breast feeding, so I'm not surprised that it is being spit out. I wouldn't force a pacifier, but a clean finger might work, too. They are growing so much at that stage. Again, my girls had similar nights where it was unclear what the problem was.

Hang in there!!
LuckyRobin Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 03:51 pm 1384962668
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Have you tried playing soft music? It mesmerized my kids most of the time. On the really bad nights I just took the baby to bed with me. We put her in her carrier seat between us on the bed and if she stirred I put a hand on her chest and she would settle. Other times I would wear her in a sling and sleep in the recliner.
SecretarySaving Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 07:34 pm 1384976057
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Keep working with the pacifier in the beginning babies will spit it out, you have to keep putting it in until they get trained. Also, implement a schedule! Feed the baby every 4 hours. If she is asleep then don't wake her and let her keep sleeping. When she is asleep YOU sleep! There are caregiver sheets online and if you print one out daily its a good way to keep track of her schedule and her diaper changes. You can circle the time and write bm for bowel movement and you can add the color, etc. Put her in a bouncy, swing or in her crib. Never on her tummy. But it doesn't hurt her if she's fed and changed if you let her cry it out and shut the door while you go in another room. Hang in there! You are doing a very good job!
LuckyRobin Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 10:01 pm 1384984879
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I disagree. A 3 week old should never be left to cry it out. If a baby that young is crying there is a reason. A 3 week old is too young to go in a bouncy seat or a swing. They can't even support their own necks properly yet. And 4 hours is far too long for a breastfeeding baby to go at that age if she is awake. I agree with not waking her to nurse, but not the rest.

The baby may be waking up with gas. How well are you burping her after the 8 p.m. feeding? A lot of first time parents don't realize just how important getting a loud burp from the baby can be. They'll get some soft quiet ones and think that is good, but it isn't enough.

Is the baby gaining weight well? If not there might be an issue with the milk supply and she may not be getting enough to eat which would make her cry. There are things that can be done to increase milk supply, like taking Fenugreek and making sure you are taking in an appropriate amount of calories.
ceejay74 Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 10:25 pm 1384986304
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Sometimes their nights and days are mixed up when they first come out! Keep trying, eventually she'll get the hang of it. Our first daughter was 2 months old when she slept 4 hours straight in the night. From there on her night sleeping improved really quickly, and soon she was sleeping through the night, much younger than the average. But she was no fun at night those first two months. It felt like forever, so I know how you feel!
TashaC. Says:
November 20th, 2013 at 11:46 pm 1384991192
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ok- lots of encouragement going on here. I'll add burping to the list of priorities for her. And we just stopped waking her at night to feed- before it was so difficult to wake her to feed. But the last few nights she has woken herself and then gets us up to feed. The milk supply is going well- she eats enough every feeding and then I leak if she goes to long between feeds!

It helps that you guys all went through it too. She's close to a month old- only a few more weeks and maybe things will improve.

Its almost 7pm now- we'll see how tonight's 8pm feeding goes!
Jenn Says:
November 21st, 2013 at 01:48 am 1384998538
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One of my sons had a really fussy period at the same age. His 'time' was 6pm. His crying was intense so I worried that he had a serious digestive issue, but he'd always be fine later. It did go away after a while.

Make sure you get as much sleep as possible. Let the house go if you need to. I learned that the lack of sleep made me much more irritable, and that probably didn't help.
Jenn Says:
November 21st, 2013 at 01:52 am 1384998743
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One other thing: you may want to make sure you aren't drinking tea with dinner. I think caffeine may cross into breast milk.
MonkeyMama Says:
November 21st, 2013 at 02:23 am 1385000609
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Who knows - could be a million reasons as to the why and yes, it will pass. Hang in there!
creditcardfree Says:
November 21st, 2013 at 02:26 am 1385000788
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Fingers crossed that 8pm feeding went well and that tonight is better. Even one night reprieve helps the parents. I, too, agree that a 3 week old baby should not be left to cry it out.
Looking Forward Says:
November 21st, 2013 at 05:59 am 1385013544
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Sounds like normal newborn/baby stuff - It is REALLY HARD WORK!!
At her age I would do WHATEVER you need to to keep her calm, happy and feeling safe. She might want to nurse for comfort even though she just finished eating. Some babies just need touching and holding a lot more than others.
The evenings were alway the hardest for me because I just wanted to relax. It does get better and easier. The first two months are really tough - Hang in there.
Could DH hold/rock/soothe her, say, from 8pm to 10:30pm so you could go take a nap? Then you could nurse again at around 11pm and then probably around 3am?

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Baby sleep schedule is making my evenings miserable

14 Responses to “Baby sleep schedule is making my evenings miserable”

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